bored 18th dec 08

everyone falling apart,
everyone's turning away.
cant help it but to feel the pain.
doing things you told people not to, yet you yourself are doing so.
why is all this happening.
because of you i had made sacrifices upon myself,
now that i have stop, everything will go back to you as they once were.
sometimes telling the truth will clear things up,
delaying will only make the misunderstanding deepens.

always pretending that i didn't know,
always pretending that i didn't heard it.
even though I cant always keep it inside me,
thus the pain and energy is building up inside of me,
I did not want to let it out in front of them.
taking in the pain and damage all by myself,
feeling lonely inside, no one understands.
always putting on a strong front.
I'm tired of looking for the answers.
I don't wan to ask anymore, just wasting my breath anyway.

time is short, i just wanted to enjoy, i just want to have fun with all my friends.
smiling and laughing away around them those were the times i really felt that i existed,
i were really happy, but it hasn't last long.
even like this its just seems to be turning to worst.
maybe is not so bad that the sight to feel people's pain and the sight of truth were taken away.
i always wonder am i really seen all these, even if i think its a delusion but its all so true,
there's no excuse i could tell myself its all fake.

so i hope things won't go wrong with tomorrow's outing/gathering.
lets all be happy and put on a big smile. =D